I've been told a hundred times to be "anxious for nothing", consequently, I've tried hard to live the worry-free life. Like an expert fisherman, I learned to cast out my cares as quickly as they came in. Looking back I've realized that casting your cares is easy to do when the cause for concern is lighter and more controllable. It's also easy not to lose sleep over something that, in the end, you know you'll be able to handle on your own.
This one was too big to cast. I had to live with it. I am living with it. So what am I to do with this worry that feels more like a companion on a journey than a burden to bear?
For the longest time I worried about being worried. It was my job to consistently abandon anxiety and charge out with a brave face. By nature I am an overly positive person so that was easy enough to do, but the inherent problem is that I always drank water out of the full half of the glass, so to speak. I had no idea what the empty half of the glass tasted like.
I constantly retreated from worry and anxiousness. I think I missed out on a major aspect of life because of that.
I'm not an advocate for getting oneself into trouble just for the sake of being anxious. I am learning though that when trouble hits, living a teflon-coated life has really only made me impervious to change.
Some things I need to change, so I have decided to remain anxious long enough to see what it is.